The Real Christmas Experience Assembly

The Real Christmas Experience Assembly – at super low price in tune with festive spirit!
Cast of 30 – easily adaptable up or down
Duration – around 15 minutes not including music
This script identifies some of the highs and lows of Christmas … in a fun way! It is not intended as a lecture but just an offering of some guidelines towards staying sane, making the Christmas period an enjoyable experience, minus all the spending, hype/expectation etc. On the downside it offers probably the worst jokes you’ll hear over the festive season – best served up with a public elf warning!
Sample Text
Narrator: I mean, a Christmas without presents?
Whole Cast: (Together) Unthinkable!
Child 2: But I think it’s important to remember how much nicer it is to give than to receive.
Narrator: That’s true. It brings far more joy. I love seeing everyone’s faces as they open their presents.
Child 1: But
Narrator: Oh no. Not you again! Anyone would think your last name was truly Scrooge!
Child 1: I’m just telling it as it is! I mean, we all have stories to tell of the ‘not so perfect Christmas’.
Child 2: Like when my mum forgot to take the turkey out of the oven. Burnt to a cinder, it was! And so we had to make do with just Brussel sprouts and carrots!
Child 3: Yes, I remember our dad nearly setting the house on fire whilst lighting the Christmas Pudding.
Child 4: And the star getting lost during the school nativity – which nearly resulted in half the teachers having a nervous breakdown!
Child 5: And the year I had such a bad cold I couldn’t utter a croak during the carol service!
Child 6: And the year every one of my family managed to fall out with each other!
Child 7: Yes, so much for ‘tis the season to be jolly’. That’s sometimes way off the truth.
Narrator: Now, I wonder why that is? I mean, with everything that’s going on, how could you not have a good time?
Child 8: But that’s just the point! There’s way too much expectation!
Child 9: Everybody is expected to have the best time!
Child 10: And so often this can result in you having the very worst time!
Child 11: You’ve only got to watch Christmas EastEnders to see that in practice!