This story is written to model exactly what students should do to write a story that they can finish within 40 minutes, which is roughly the amount of writing time they get at GCSE. There are no published stories of around 500 words, so I have begun to write my own. Writing one on a real character takes away the fear of planning - students already know how the story starts. There are three copies of the story: 1. Without any annotation 2. With a key to the annotations which teach a range of skills many English teachers ignore: a. The Power of Verbs b. How to introduce the character in an interesting way c How to use humour, not jokes d How to build tension using contrast and juxtaposition e How dialogue must reveal character before plot f The power of repetition and rule of three, or triplets, in building a rhythm h Paragraphing for impact 3. With a key to the annotations which teach the more conventional story writing skills: a. Metaphor b. Similes c. Personification d. Alliteration e. Assonance, Half Rhyme and Hidden Alliteration Finally, you also get a completely free video on how to teach this at: http://bit.ly/WriteAboutARealCharacter The PowerPoint slides which teach this lesson, and which I use in the video are available as a separate resource.