Midsummer Nights Dream Alternative Version III

Midsummer Nights Dream Alternative Version III
This alternative ‘nightmare’ version of Midsummer Night's Dream runs at approximately 50 minutes, has a cast of 25, and a 'wicked' choice of music! This is the third in a series of scripts written by playwright Sue Russell - the first was for a small summer camp group (of 10), the second for an expanded cast (of 17), and this third for a cast of 25. Suitable for children and adults alike - let's hope your director has an easier time of it than mine (alias long suffering teacher!)
Theseus: Are you referring to our night's entertainment, my dear?
Hippolyta: If you can call it that! From what I've heard ..
Theseus: (Interrupting) Ah, never judge a book by its cover!
Teacher: (Raising his copy of Midsummer Night's Dream, above the covers) Indeed. You can say that again! Still, nothing's going to spoil anything tonight. Just as long as I stay awake to the end!
(Bottom, bouncing onto the stage)
Bottom: And we'll sure make sure that there's no falling asleep during our amazing performance!
(Joined by Quince, Flute, Snout, Starveling and Snug)
Bottom: Or should I say, my amazing performance!
Quince: Now, now, Bottom! Remember what I said to you about team spirit!
Bottom: (Tutting) Makes it sound more like a game of soccer! I prefer to think of myself as following in the footsteps of Brad Pitt, rather than David Beckham!
Lysander: (Laughing) I'm sure either gentleman would be equally honored - to know who was following him!
Demetrius: Of course! (Pointing at Bottom) What a fine figure of a man!
Hermia: (Crossing her brow with her hand) I grow weak, just looking at him!
Helena: (Pretending to faint) Such a man! Such a vision of ....
Theseus: (Impatiently) Yes, yes. Could we leave the amateur dramatics to these 6 players please?
Hippolyta: (Groaning) Something tells me, this is going to be one long night!