Superheroes Assembly for Key Stage II Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration: 15 - 20 minutes (without inclusion of music suggestions) Our Narrator has faced some 'mission impossibles' in his time but a Superheroes Assembly without ... Superheroes? Thank goodness there is always an Ancient Greek superhero around when you need him. But bringing out the 'super' in these particular heroes may prove too much of a challenge even for Hercules! Sample Text: Music 1 – Holding out for a hero – Bonnie Tyler (Whole cast file in, in order of speaking, seating themselves along two rows of fifteen seats, facing the audience) Narrator: Good morning and welcome to (Silence as Narrator waits for cast to respond - nothing but a couple of feeble coughs) (Narrator turns round to face cast, speaking sideways on so that audience can hear) Narrator: What’s going on? Where are all my Superheroes? Superhero 1: Do you mean, us? Superhero 2: If you want a show of superpowers here today, you’re out of luck! Narrator: But why? What’s going on? Superhero 3: More a case of what’s not going on! Superhero 4: ‘Fraid we’re all recovering from colds Superhero 5: And not feeling in the least bit ‘superhero-ish’! Narrator: (Gasping) Oh no! So what am I supposed to tell this audience? Superhero 6: Come back another day? Narrator: No, I can’t do that! As you can see, they’re all here! Superhero 7: Well, sorry, but even superheroes have their off days. Narrator: (Desperately) But not, please, on the day of my assembly! Superhero 8: ‘Fraid so! Narrator: (Clasping head and groaning) Oh no! This cannot be! What a disaster! Music 2 Greased Lightnin’ – Grease (Enter Hercules, performing John Travolta moves) Narrator: Well, good morning! (Looking through notes in confusion) This is … er … a bit of a surprise! (Hercules snatches notes) Hercules: Oh you don’t want to bother with those! Let’s go for a bit of good old fashioned spontaneity this morning! Narrator: Old fashioned? Hercules: Well, maybe a bit more than old. Make that, Ancient. (Pauses) Oh, and Greek! Narrator: You mean, Ancient Greek? Hercules: Exactly! And who better to represent that magnificent race – than myself, the great Hercules? Narrator: Wow! You certainly were a superhero in your time!

Good and Bad Assembly or Class Play Ever wondered why some people are happy and others not? Could it perhaps have anything to do with their outlook on life? The two gangs in this assembly certainly see life very differently - well, they would, wouldn't they - given that one are a group of peace-loving hippies and the other, a group of street-wise warriors? But no differences are irreconcilable. Read on! Cast of 30 - easily adjustable up or down Duration - around 10 minutes without inclusion of music suggestions (which will double the length of performance) Sample Text (BG stands for Bad Gang; GG stands for Good Gang) BG Leader: (To GG Leader) There you have it, Sunshine! That’s my gang! Where’s yours? Music 3 Joybringer – Manfred Mann’s Earthband (BG 15 – 28 perform song, singing and dancing, joyously) GG Leader: (Applauding) Ah now that’s more like it! Thank you so much! GG 1: Oh! Our pleasure! Thank you for listening! BG 1: (Mimicking) Oh! Our pleasure! Thank you for listening (Bad Gang all fall about laughing) (BG 2 goes over to GG 2, in threatening manner) BG 2: So what are you going to say, little ‘joybringer’? (Bad Gang all fall about laughing) GG 2: Oh you needn’t think I’m afraid of you! BG 2: Well, you should be! I don’t reckon much of your chances in a stand up fight with us lot (Turns to Bad Gang) Am I right, guys? Bad Gang: (Aggressively) Right! (BG 2 swaggers back to seat) GG 3: Oh I can’t tell you how much we’re (pointing to Good Gang) all looking forward to that! (Collective Gasp from Bad Gang) BG 3: Are you mad? Or just plain stupid? GG 3: (Laughing) Maybe a little mad! But (pointing to Good Gang) we’re all good with that, right? Good Gang: (Joyfully) Right! BG 4: (Contemptuously) Pah! Just look at them! Thinking themselves so great! GG 4: Oh I can assure you we’re far from being just thinkers! BG 4: (Laughing, sarcastically) Right! You still up for some action? (BG 4 struts up and down, bracing his muscles; Bad Gang all do the same) GG 4: Very impressive – as a display! Shame it doesn’t have much substance! BG 5: Pah! Just jealous, that’s what you are! Making fun of us – how low can you stoop! GG 5: (Anxiously) Oh we didn’t want to make you feel bad about yourselves Music 4 Bad – Michael Jackson (Bad Gang all jump to their feet and perform again, as before)

Respect Assembly Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down. Duration - around 10 minutes not including music suggestions. This PSHE class play was written for Key Stage I - the part of the narrator taken by the Class Teacher. Other Character Assemblies, Key Stage I & II, are available from writer, Sue Russell. Sample Text Goldilocks: Help! Help! Save me from these vicious bears! Mummy Bear: (Retorting angrily) Vicious bears? Daddy Bear: (Laughing) Who? Us? Baby Bear: We’re the victims here, not her! Narrator: Aha! Goldilocks and the Three Bears! Now that’s an interesting tale! Mummy: One of burglary Daddy Bear: Break in Baby Bear: And vandalism! Goldilocks: Oops! That bad? All three bears: (Together, nodding) That bad! Narrator: Oh dear! So not only have we a total lack of respect for people Goldilocks: Bears! Narrator: No difference! Don’t go making things worse for yourself, young lady! Mummy Bear: Quite! Who ever heard such cheek? Narrator: I repeat. Not only have we a total lack of respect for people (pauses) .. and bears! But a lack of respect for other’s property as well! (Whole cast gasps in shock) Goldilocks: (To Bears) I’m so sorry! I should never have walked into your home Mummy Bear: Or eaten our food Baby Bear: Or sat on our furniture Daddy Bear: Or slept on our beds. Goldilocks: I am so sorry. I’ll never do it again! (Exit Goldilocks and the Three Bears, smiling at each other) Narrator: Well, there’s a happy ending! Child 1: But it’s very easy to go wrong! To forget that respect thing. We do need reminding of some important facts. Child 2: Everyone is different. Child 3: We all look different Child 4: We all like different things Child 5: I like running! Child 6: I like football! Child 7: I like reading a book! Narrator: And that’s fine. Nothing wrong with having these differences! Child 8: Our world would be so boring if everyone was the same! Child 9: It doesn’t matter Child 10: If you support Chelsea! Child 11: Or Arsenal!

St. George's Day Assembly or Class Play What on earth could the queen of England, our narrator alias Beefeater/guard of the Tower of London and the Artful Dodger have in common? Read on to find out what 'Twist' turns the Artful Dodger into Sir Artful Dodger! Cast size: 25 but easily adjusted up or down Duration: Around 20 minutes (depending on how much music is used) The focus of this play is London. Time constraints meant I just touched on England's history - events and people. I have addressed this 'shortfall' in the collection of guided reading scripts (available separately). Sample Text (Enter Sir Winston Churchill, smoking a pipe) Narrator: Ah, Sir Winston Churchill! Thank goodness. You pulled us through that Second World War - can you help me deal with this group of .. of ... super-women? Sir Winston Churchill: What? This lot? Leave it to me! Music 5 Who Do you Think You Are - Spice Girls (Spice Girls sing and make threatening gestures toward Sir Winston Churchill, who cowers and runs off stage) Narrator: (Aside) Hmm. Time for a different kind of ‘Help!" (Turning to Spice Girls) Hey girls, here come the Beatles! Spice Girls: (Together) Beetles? Did someone say, beetles? (All Spice Girls scream and run off stage) Music 6 Help - Beatles (Beatles stride on, singing Help!) Narrator: OK! That's probably as much help as I need! Thank you, boys! Beatles: (Together) No probs! (Exit Beatles) Narrator: So. Enough of this frivolity! Back to the serious stuff! Take my job at the Tower, for example (Queen Elizabeth runs back onto stage, in state of total panic) Narrator: Your Majesty! Whatever is the matter? Don't tell me you spilt your tea? Queen Eliz: (Gasping) Haven't you heard? Music 7 London Bridge is Falling Down (Cast sings first verse) Narrator: But that was around one thousand years ago, Your Majesty! It has been rebuilt several times since then! Queen Eliz: No! No! It's not that I'm worried about! Narrator: Oh no! Don't tell me the Thames Barrier has failed? Queen Eliz: What? The world's largest movable flood barrier? Of course not! Narrator: So. Has Buckingham Palace been burgled? Music 8 They're Changing Guards At Buckingham Palace (Cast sings first verse, as two guards in uniform march up and down) Queen Eliz: What? With my fine guards to keep us safe? I don't think so! Narrator: (Gasping) Don't tell me St. Paul's Cathedral has burnt to the ground again? Queen Eliz: (Sighing in exasperation) No. Our fire service has improved a little since that Great Fire of London!

Ancient Greek Myths The Gorgon's Head Assembly or Class Play Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration: around 10 - 15 minutes not including music What was Poseidon thinking - taking on all these women? He might succeed at putting the youth Perseus in his place but a group of 'wronged women'? Never! This is one of a large collection of Ancient Greek scripts written by Sue Russell – guided reading scripts also available. Sample Text: Medusa: Just like I said! Gods! Men! The bane of our lives! Poseidon: (Clutching his forehead, muttering) I think I have a headache coming on. (Pauses)You know something? I suddenly feel just a little outnumbered! Would you ladies mind just giving me a short break? (Exit Athene, Medusa and Danae, shrugging their shoulders) Poseidon: Phew! Peace at last! Oh, don’t get me wrong. I have nothing against ‘the weaker sex’ (Athene comes storming back) Music 3 War – Edwin Starr – Brief excerpt Athene: What was that you just said? Weaker, eh? I’ll show you weaker! (Athene strides up and down, wielding her sword) Poseidon: (Holding hand up) OK. I apologize. Athene: Goddess of wisdom and war! (To Poseidon) You’d do well to remember that! Poseidon: (Aside) As if I could forget! (To Athene) Now, what was I saying about having a little peace? Athene: Huh! Give me war any day! (Exit Athene) Poseidon: (Clutching head) Women! I knew I should never have agreed to this! (Enter Perseus, giving Poseidon a ‘high five) Perseus: What’s up, bro? Poseidon: (Indignantly) Bro? I’ll give you bro! Perseus: OK so I guess it’s Uncle, really – seeing as Zeus was my dad, and your brother! Poseidon: Correct! So, no more bro, right? Perseus: Fair enough! So, what’s the plan, dude? Poseidon: (Exploding) Dude? That’s even worse than bro! What is it with you youngsters? Can’t you talk normally? Perseus: (Sighing) OK I’ll try! I’m just not used to hanging out with oldies like you! Poseidon: (Exploding) Now look here, young Perseus! If you and me are going to get along, you need to show a little respect! (Enter Danae) Danae: Perseus! Where are those manners I taught you? Poseidon: I think he might have lost them during his travels! Danae: Well, let’s help him find them again! Poseidon is only trying to Poseidon: (Looking at his watch) Get this story told? Well, that’s proving a bit of a challenge! (To Danae) No offence, madam, but you women don’t half talk a lot! (Enter Polydectes, accompanied by ‘several’ women, all chatting and laughing) Polydectes: (Groaning) Tell me about it! You want to try keeping them quiet in court! Once they get going there’s no stopping them!

Twelve New Labours of Hercules Assembly NB: This script is not about the original 12 Labours of Hercules! It is based around a completely different set of challenges – on the kind of ‘admirable qualities’ the cast feels Hercules should have – presenting him with a 12-part self-improvement plan! This is a kind of spin off from the Superheroes script - almost a reversal in fact; as whilst in that script it was Hercules trying to make superheroes out of a pretty unpromising cast, this script is about the cast pulling the punches - Hercules struggling along in their wake! Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration around 15 - 20 minutes not including music suggestions. This Key Stage II class play is PSHE ‘orientated’ as it focuses on 'character improvements' e.g. humility, courage, mutual respect, upholding what is right, keeping positive, patience, love .... and of course the hardest of all, being happy! Sample Text: Child 11: A start to your self-improvement plan. Hercules: My what? Child 12: Well, we all feel you are lacking Hercules: Me? The great Hercules? Lacking? Child 12: (Coughing) If you would allow me to finish? We all feel you are lacking – make that, greatly lacking in some of the qualities you should have as Hercules: As a great superhero? I don’t think so! Child 13: Actually, I was going to say, as a member of the human race! Your mother was a mortal, right? Hercules: Yes Child 14: So I’m sure she’d appreciate us trying to improve you! Hercules: Huh! How can you improve on perfection? Music 3 Chariots of Fire theme music (Hercules strides around ‘looking magnificent’) (Child 15 walks over to the music and turns it off) Hercules: (Indignantly) Hey! What’s the big idea? Child 15: I think we all get it! You are Mr Universe! Hercules: (Looking very pleased with himself) Well, thank you. I Child 15: (Pointing to head) In your head, that is! Hercules: (Furiously) Pardon? Child 15: Oh do stop saying that! Anyone would think you had a hearing problem! Hercules: (Spluttering) I most definitely do not! Everything about my physique is perfect! Child 15: Like I said, maybe on the outside. But it’s what’s on the inside that is sadly lacking. But don’t worry, we are going to help fix that! Hercules: (Sarcastically) And may I ask how? Child 16: You may! All very simple. You just have to complete 12 simple tasks that we set you. Hercules: (Laughing) Oh I get it! You are going to give me another 12 labours.

General Election Assembly - Who should be our next prime minister? 6 weeks to go … and bored with the General Election already? Then this assembly is your perfect tonic! As for our narrator, who would envy their task of choosing a prime minister - from a class of 30?! The choice? Football stars, movie stars, rock stars ..... and a whole lotta girl/boy attitude between the Spice 'lot' and a certain Direction! Somebody needs to tell them about equality - and who better than .... S Club 7?! This is a very light hearted look at the coming election. The ‘possible candidates’ are a selection of celebs – chosen purely for entertainment sake. For a more serious ‘take’, the script could be adapted to include a far more serious list of people either now or in the past e.g. Gandhi, King, Mandela, Mother Theresa etc. Likewise, whilst dealing with the current topic of the election, this script could be used for citizenship because of its PSHE component – this latter could be extended by adding a section on ‘What would you change if you were prime minister?’ Duration: 10 – 15 minutes reading time; around 20 – 30 minutes including music suggestions. Cast of 30 - easily adapted up or down; and characters may be replaced by children’s own choices. Sample Text Child 1: I think David Beckham should be prime minister! Child 2: Nah! It’s got to be Lionel Messi! Child 3: No! Wayne Rooney has my vote! Child 4: Rubbish! It’s got to be Cristiano Ronaldo! Narrator: (Blowing whistle) Excuse me! Since when did any of these footballers know anything about politics? They might be pretty good at running up and down a pitch, but running a country? I don’t think so! (Exit Child 1, 2, 3 and 4) Narrator: Next! (Enter ‘athlete’ – Child 5) Child 5: I’m here representing the world of athletics! I’d vote for Jessica Ennis! Narrator: (To audience, sighing) What is it with kids and sport? (To Child 5) Yes, I can see why you might think Ms Ennis would set us all a fine example Child 5: A prime role model! An inspiration to us all! Narrator: Yes, yes. I totally agree! But there is a difference between running along those tracks Child 5: In record times! Narrator: And, …..let me finish…., running the country! (To audience) Am I having a moment of déjà vu or didn’t I just say that a very short while ago? (To Child 5) Anyway. Thank you … but no thank you! (Exit Child 5) Music 3 Theme music from Doctor Who

Olympic Games Assembly for Key Stage I. This script covers past ‘host nations’ but is predominantly an overview of the 2016 sporting events. Cast size 30. Olympic Games Assembly for Key Stage I Rio 2016 With coverage of all hosts nations (past and present) plus all the sports present at the Olympics, this is quite an epic - even by the Ancient Greeks' standards! Cast of 30 - easily adapted up or down Duration - 10 to 15 minutes Sample Text: Kallipateira: Huh! But I don’t see any horses! You should have seen our chariot races! (Enter Equestrian Team) Rider 1: Well, our horses may not race but look how well behaved they are! Rider 2: And look how well they jump! (Exit Equestrian Team) Narrator: So that just leaves (Enter Ball Games representative, carrying various balls and rackets) Ball Games rep: The Ball Games! Narrator: Let me help! (Reading from a list) Tennis, table tennis, volley ball, hockey, golf, rugby, football, basketball, handball and badminton! (Exit Ball Games representative) (Recitation of Olympic Ode Chorus) (Enter Archery, Shooting and Fencing representative, carrying assortment of ‘equipment’) Narrator: Wow! What are all these sports! Archery, Shooting and Fencing rep: Archery, Shooting and Fencing! (Exit Archery, Shooting and Fencing representative) (Recitation of Olympic Ode Chorus) (Enter cyclist, on bike) Narrator: And last but by no means least! Cyclist: Watch me cycle! (All applaud) (Exit cyclist) (Enter Homer) Homer: (Spluttering) Well! Narrator: Not speechless again, are we, Homer? Homer: Just a bit! I think it’s time I returned to Ancient Greece – where life was a lot simpler! Other scripts available: 1. Brazil - Host Country to 2016 Olympics 2. Olympics PRIDE Assembly (PSHE 'team spirit' script) 3. Olympic Games 2016 Leavers Assembly 4. Rio 2016 Olympic Games Assembly - covering all 28 sports 5. History of the Olympics Assembly 6. Rio 2016 Olympic Games Assembly: history and events - combined script including Olympic Ode 7. Paralympics 2016 Assembly GUIDED READING SCRIPTS 1. A Complete History of the Olympic Games Guided Reading Scripts plus quizzes - set of 8 scripts, plus quizzes 2. Olympics PRIDE Guided Reading QUIZ Rio 2016 Olympic Games Quiz - 100 questions and answers! plus OLYMPIC ODE

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland Take Two - or The Trial of Alice (An alternative version) Insolent, conceited, insensitive, stupid, cruel, dishonest .... surely not the Alice that Lewis Carroll gave us? Read on to find out how false fiction can be in this alternative take on one of our best loved classics. In this one Alice is facing those animals she met ‘down the rabbit hole’ on her first visit – in court! See how she fares under the pressure of the justice system – Wonderland-Style! PLEASE NOTE: This is not a re-telling of the original story. Cast of 30. Duration: Longer version around 20 - 25 minutes; Shorter version around 15 – 20 minutes. Sample Script: Alice: Now look! There’s been some terrible mistake! I’m here to be queen, not prisoner! (Whole court erupts in laughter) Queen: (Holding her sides) Oh dear! This really is turning out to be the funniest day of my life! King: Totally priceless, my dear! Alice: (Sobbing) No! No! This can’t be happening. White Rabbit will tell you it as it is! (White Rabbit just shrugs his shoulders) Alice: Oh no! This has got to be a bad dream I’ll wake up from in a minute! (Alice pinches herself and then cries even more) (Mouse, Duck and Dodo stand up) Mouse: Oh oh! She’s making one of those lakes again! Duck: That’s how she caught us out last time! Dodo: Playing the innocent! Mouse: And then scaring me to death with stories of that cat! Alice: You mean, Dinah? (Mouse starts screaming; other two get him to sit down) Duck: (To King) You see what I mean? Dodo: Ah! She’s not going to get away with it a second time! (King gestures for both to sit down) Alice: Get away with what? Queen: (To King) Does it matter? Off with her head! Alice: I was wondering when you were going to get round to saying that! King: Oh! The cheek! (To jurors) Please note. Offence Number one – Threatening Behaviour Alice: But I King: Offence Number Two – Interrupting Alice: But that’s not fair! King: Offence Number Three – Whingeing and complaining Alice: Hey, wait a minute King: Offence Number Four – Speaking out of turn (Alice is about to say something else but White Rabbit rushes over and puts his paw over her mouth) Queen: (To White Rabbit) Thank you! She really doesn’t know when to shut up, does she? King: No my dear! Not at all like you! Queen: Not at all! Alice: Huh! That’s a joke! Queen: (Screaming) Off with her head! Off with her head! (King ‘calms her down’ before addressing jurors again, both scribbling away trying to keep up) King: Make that Offence Number Five – Being Insolent and Rude and Juror 1: Please slow down a bit. Juror 2: We’re not used to as many offences as this!

Fashion Assembly including The Emperor’s New Clothes The story of The Emperor’s New Clothes provides the bulk of the text - with a minimum cast of 10; cast numbers are made up to 30 by the addition of numerous fashion models, plus ‘sparring’ fashion designer and narrator! Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down Duration - reading of text around 15 minutes but this does not include music or performances - both of which can be increased to effectively double the length of the play. Sample Text (1): Music 1 – You’re So Vain – Carly Simon (Whole cast files in, seating themselves in order, along two rows of fifteen, facing the audience, Narrator standing at the side throughout) Narrator: Good morning and welcome to our assembly on Whole cast: (Together) Fashion! Music 2 – Fashion – David Bowie (Line of fashion models walk up and down ‘the catwalk’ in front of the audience) Narrator: (Applauding as models return to their places) Very good! Bravo! (To audience) But seriously! Did you see the size of those heels? I mean, how on earth do they manage to walk on such things? Impractical or what? (Enter Fashion Designer) Fashion Designer: (Sniffing his disapproval) Oh! Hasn’t anyone told you? It’s about how you look on that catwalk. Narrator: (Angrily) Even if it cripples you? Fashion Designer: Oh darling! Aren’t we being just a tad overdramatic? Narrator: (Huffily) No, not really! I wouldn’t be able to move in those heels! (Fashion Designer pointedly looks Narrator up and down) Fashion Designer: No, I don’t suppose you would! (Aside to audience) No great loss to the fashion world, right? Sample Text (2) - from The Emperor’s New Clothes Narrator: Once upon a time there lived an emperor who was very fond of his clothes. (Enter Emperor and two courtiers) Emperor: (Twirling on the spot) So, what do you think of my outfit today? Courtier 1: (Gushing) Magnificent! Courtier 2: (Even more gushing) Fantastic! Emperor: (Preening himself) Oh really! Flattery will get you nowhere! Courtier 1: (Aside) Wanna bet? Courtier 2: We wouldn’t get far without it! Emperor: What was that? Commenting on the quality of this wonderful fabric, no doubt? Courtier 1: Oh, of course, majesty! Courtier 2: The finest in the land, to be sure! Emperor: I rather think so! (Aside) Best not say how much it cost! More than I pay these two courtiers in a year! (To Courtier 1) A mirror, please! It must be at least a minute since I looked at myself!

Pinocchio Class Play or Assembly A story of redemption and self-discovery – with one small twist! Cast of 24 plus – may be increased with inclusion of music suggestions. Duration: Around 40 minutes plus, with inclusion of all music suggestions. The duration can however be reduced to around 20 minutes if the music is left out. The script consists of 4 scenes of 5 - 10 minutes reading time, each. There is a music playlist of 15 songs but choice of these is discretionary/do not need to be included. Pinocchio script, cast of 6, is also available plus Pinocchio Pantomime which is an adaptation of this script - with larger than life Fairy and lots of terrible jokes! Sample Text: (Sound of whistle blowing, Pinocchio being chased by a policeman) (Policeman grabs Pinocchio by his collar and holds him tight) Policeman: Hey! Where do you think you are going? Pinocchio: (Struggling) Let go of me! I’ve done nothing wrong! (Geppetto arrives, puffing and panting) Geppetto: (To Pinocchio) Oh there you are! What were you thinking, running off like that? Policeman: Ah, I get it. (To Pinocchio) Running away, were you? Hmm. I wonder what from! (Policeman lets go of Pinocchio and grabs Geppetto by the collar instead) Policeman: Gotcha! And such a sweet-looking old gent! (To audience) They’re always the worst, the innocent looking ones! I just happen to know this due to my long and, it has to be said, quite remarkable service in the police force. Huh! Nothing escapes this hand of the law! (To Pinocchio) Go home, sonny! (To Geppetto) And you can come with me! To the nick! (Exit Policeman holding Geppetto; Pinocchio goes off in opposite direction) Narrator: (To Audience) Well. You’d think any normal, decent, loyal, loving son would protest just a little more on his father’s behalf, wouldn’t you? After all, Geppetto was totally innocent and certainly didn’t deserve to spend a night behind bars. (Enter Pinocchio, yawning and stretching) Narrator: Let’s watch. Surely there will be some signs of remorse. (Pauses) Some tiny show of concern for his father? Pinocchio: Well, that was a strange turn of events. (Pauses) Ah well, time for bed! (Narrator gasps and shakes his head) (Enter Cricket, wearing ‘happy’ colourful clothes)

Pinocchio Pantomime A story of redemption and self-discovery – with one small twist – well, maybe not so small when the whole plot hinges on it! NB: This script is the Pinocchio class play adapted as a pantomime i.e. with addition of jokes, a larger than life Fairy as the Dame; and the script adjusted accordingly. Music: there is quite an extensive playlist – 15! The choice of these numbers is totally discretionary. Cast of 24 plus Duration Reading time – around 30 minutes not including music or jokes at the end. 4 scenes of approximately 5 - 10 minutes each – more with addition of jokes at the end. Total performance time: around 40 – 50 minutes plus, depending on how much music is used and how many jokes told. The performance could be reduced substantially with omission of both music and jokes. Sample Text: Narrator: Ah! There you are! At last! The good fairy! We’ve been waiting for you! Fairy: Oh, you mean this script needs something good in it? Well, I couldn’t agree with you more! (To audience) What a load of rubbish, eh? I’ve been sitting out in the wings (Twirling, showing off her wings) Beautiful, aren’t they? About time you all had a treat! This has to rate as one of the worst pantos Narrator: (Interrupting furiously) Hey! Wait a minute! Wait a minute! So where have you been, all this time we have been performing our ‘oh so terrible pantomime’? Fairy: Where have I been, darling? (Twirling) Do you really need to ask? (Pauses) Well, getting ready of course! A fairy must always look her absolute best at all times, especially this time of year! Narrator: (Aside to audience) Strikes me this fairy could spend a little more time down the gym! Fairy: (Exploding) I beg your pardon! I trust you are not suggesting I lose any of (pauses as she tries to find her waist) this exquisite figure? Narrator: Well, it might have helped you get here a bit quicker! Things have just been going from bad to worse, here on stage! Fairy: Oh, you mean the Pinocchio thing? Narrator: Er yes, it is his story we are telling here today! Fairy: Ah well, then. My timing is perfect (pauses as she minces over to the audience) … as ever! Here I am! Narrator: Just in the nick of time! We so need you – or rather, Pinocchio does! Fairy: Yes, I have been watching this rather sad story unravel. That puppet certainly needs all the help he can get! Narrator: But it has to be the right kind of help. He’s been receiving an unfortunate amount of the wrong type. Fairy: What do you mean? Narrator: Well, I’m afraid we have a slight glitch in the plot. You see, one of the good guys has turned bad! Fairy: Oh no! That is bad news! And who might that be?

Ocean Assembly including The Little Mermaid This class play was originally written for Key Stage I but has a lot of additional material – FREE set of 5 Sea Life Quizzes, 350 questions and answers – that could easily be added to raise the level to Key Stage 2. As an outline of The Little Mermaid story is included, this script falls within both the science and literature sections of the curriculum (as well as between two key stages – sorry, a little difficult to place!) If the original story of the Little Mermaid threatens to leave you with tears in your eyes, the jokes of the supporting cast (Cranky Crab, Daft Dolphin, Cod Father just to mention a few) will soon cheer you up … or maybe reduce you to further tears! Sample Text: (All Sea Creatures stand up and speak to The Little Mermaid in turn) Cranky Crab: Why did you turn your back on the ocean? Timid Turtle: How could you leave us? Daft Dolphin: Why go to the land Clown Fish: When you had all that sea to play in? Cod Father: Foolish girl! Angel Fish: You should have kept your tail Jiggly Jellyfish: Fancy giving it up Scary Shark: For what? A human being? Swishing Swordfish: A life on land? Old Octopus: Losing your family Saucy Stingray: Your friends Lazy Lobster: Your everything! Blue Whale: Why? Barmy Barnacle: What were you thinking? Weary Walrus: I don’t understand Perky Penguin: You gave up so much Deep Sea Fish 1 – Angler fish: And for what? Deep Sea Fish 2 – Hatchet fish: Yes, tell us! Deep Sea Fish 3 – Lantern fish: For what?

Be Inspired New Year Class Play or Assembly Cast Size 30 – but this number can easily be adapted up or down. Duration Around 20 minutes. The performance can be extended by the addition of more jokes and poetry. Do you feel the need for a large dose of inspiration in order to start 2020? Look no further, here’s the script for you! A whole month’s worth of quotations that will give your students plenty to aspire to! Sample Text: Music I – I’m So Excited – Pointer Sisters (Whole cast ‘dances’ in, seating themselves along two rows of fifteen seats, facing the audience) Narrator: (To cast) Are we all feeling inspired, that is the question? (Everyone cheers) Narrator: Now, that’s how I like to start an assembly! Lots of enthusiasm, zest, passion Child 1: Yes, yes, we get all that! But where are we going with all this good feeling? Narrator: Well, I’m kind of hoping it’s going to last (pauses) at least until the end of January! Child 2: (Shaking head) Ooh, I wouldn’t count on it. I mean, that’s thirty-one days you’re talking about! Narrator: I know it’s a lot to ask but, well, it’s good to have things to aspire to along the way! As to how we’re going to achieve such a long-term goal Child 3: (Interrupting) Oh, that’s simple. We just have to get inspired! Child 4: We’ve been doing some research and we’ve come up with some pretty inspirational stuff! Narrator: (Clapping hands) Excellent! Then, take it away! Child 5: So, it’s all about behaving in the right way. Narrator: (Aside to audience, incredulously) Every day through January? Seriously? That would have to be seen to be believed! Child 6: We have actually managed to find ‘inspiration’ for every day of the month, for each of the thirty-one days, starting with Child 7: January 1st. Here comes the first of the many inspirational quotations we found.

Rugby World Cup 2019 Assembly Cast of 13, duration around 20 minutes – depending on how many hakas you can fit in! This is an attempt to enlighten those who find rugby a bit of an intellectual challenge! Using a similar format to that used for recent Cricket Assembly, this likewise uses an A-Z of terminology to try and throw some light on the game and how it works! Sample Text: Narrator: Fab! So, let’s just have a few basics of the game. Child 15: There are fifteen players in each team Child 16: And the idea is to score as many points as possible! Child 17: By touching the ball down behind your opponent’s ‘try line’. You get five points for that Child 18: Or kicking it through and over the goalposts. You get two points if it’s a conversion or three if it’s a penalty. Narrator: It’s getting more complicated than football already! Child 19: Oh, way more! Though in rugby you can run with the ball in your hands Child 20: And give bear hugs to your opponents! Child 21: Though you’d hardly call them friendly bear hugs! Child 22: Not when you’re dragging them to the ground! Narrator: I certainly wouldn’t want to be under any of those guys! They’re hardly lightweights! Child 23: And they certainly have plenty of attitude! Child 24: There are various types of tackle – spear, crash and choke to name but three! Child 25: And then there’s the hospital pass Narrator: (Interrupting) This is all beginning to sound a bit dangerous! Please tell me there are plenty of rules! Child 26: Most certainly! If there weren’t, they’d be no players left standing! Child 27: These guys are super fit but the referee is there to keep them safe Child 28: So, no high tackles – that is above chest level when there’s clear contact to the neck and head. Child 29: A definite no no! Child 30: A red card offence! Narrator: So, how about a simple A-Z of rugby like we agreed?

Beatrix Potter Class Play or Assembly for Key Stage I (5 – 7 year olds), Part I. This is the first of a set of four plays – Parts I, II and III cover five tales each, and Part IV covers six. Thus, twenty-one in total. (For complete listing, scroll down to bottom of page). Cast of 24 (easily adapted up or down) and duration of around 10 minutes – this is reading time so performance can take it beyond this with possibility of further additions. Part I based on the first five tales: • Tale 1 The Tale of Peter Rabbit • Tale 2 The Tale of Squirrel Nutkin • Tale 3 The Tailor of Gloucester • Tale 4 The Tale of Benjamin Bunny • Tale 5 The Tale of Two Bad Mice Cast of 24 plus Narrator (this role to be taken by the Class Teacher) (Cast size can easily be adapted by the addition or omission of characters from each tale) Tale 1 The Tale of Peter Rabbit Group I Peter Rabbit Flopsy Mopsy Cottontail Mother Rabbit Mr. McGregor Sample Text Mother Rabbit: (Tutting and wagging her finger) Naughty boys! (Flopsy, Mopsy and Cottontail cross their arms in front of them, like their mother, scowling and nodding their heads, smugly) Mr. McGregor: (Shaking his rake in anger) Bad, bad bunnies! Narrator: Oh dear! What did they do? Tale 2 The Tale of Squirrel Nutkin Group II Squirrel Nutkin Twinkleberry (brother) Cousin 1, 2 and 3 Mr. Brown (the owl) Sample Text Narrator: Sounds quite respectful to me? Mr. Brown: (Exploding) Respectful? (Pointing at Squirrel Nutkins) Him? Twinkleberry: Time to say sorry, again, brother Nutkin! Squirrel Nutkin: I was only trying to have fun! Tale 3 The Tailor of Gloucester Group III Tailor of Gloucester Mice (4) Simpkin the Cat Sample Text Tailor: Teamwork! (All four mice hold up the coat and waistcoat) Mouse 1: We made these for the mayor Mouse 2: To wear on Christmas Day Mouse 3: On his wedding day! Mouse 4: (Cheering) We did it! Narrator: And I’m so glad to see such a well-behaved cat.

Dinosaurs Guided Reading Scripts 5 plays (6 speakers each) with quizzes Also available: Dinosaurs Rock Assembly or Class Play Sample Texts Play 1 ‘Favourites' Steg: Hmm. Not blindingly obvious! But then I'm not famous for my brains! T. Rex: No. That goes for a lot of you ‘tiny headed' plant eaters! Dippie: Nothing wrong with having a brain the size of a walnut! Brachie: Here! Here! But what was your other name, Steg? I don't think you got round to telling us. Steg: Er, um. T.Rex: Let me help! It's ‘covered lizard' or ‘roof lizzard'. Steg: Ah yes! That's it! And of course I have that name because .... Er... um.. Try: Oh come on, Steg! Try a little harder! Steg: All right, Mister Try, Try and Try-again-ceratops! Play 2 The Biggest! (Earth shaking) Cecil: Whoa! Sorry everyone! That happens every time I move! Chicken: Then please don't! It's really scary for one as small as me! Car: Chicken! You'd better toughen up if you're gonna stick around with us big boys! Mam: Yeah! Better be careful we don't trip over this one! Chicken: I might be small but I could win a running race against you lot - hands down! Cecil: Well, if it came to feet down, you'd be well and truly squashed under me! Thebiggest! Mam: And without wishing to stick my neck out .... Guess what I'm most famous for? Gig: Nothing to do with having the longest neck ever, I don't suppose? Play 3 The Deadliest Deinonychus: Certainly could! Size isn't everything, you know! I probably had the deadliest reputation out of all of you! Allosaurus: When you were hunting in packs you were unstoppable. Deinonychus: Indeed. I was the supreme pack hunter! I had no enemies. Not surprising with a name like ‘Terrible Claw'! My very own flick knife! Play 4 Head Bangers! 2-Ridge: So, I'm guessing we're not all heading for the nearest beauty pageant! Dome-head: I'm not ashamed of my ...(pauses) slightly unusual looks! Long-crest: Nor me! We should be proud of our crests and lumps and bumps! Helmet-head: Right on! We've got nothing to hide .. Trumpet-head: Not even under that helmet?! Helmet-head: Or what about up your trumpet? Play 5 Flyers and Swimmers Pteranodon: (Sniffing) There's something very fishy going on here. Pterodactylus: That's it! We're all - or nearly all - fish-eaters! Mosasaurus: Though I wasn't fussy! I'd eat anything! Elasmosaurus: You certainly had the jaws for it! I guess you just swam along with them wide open!

Second World War Guided Reading Scripts (World War II Assembly also available plus collection of scripts on the First World War including one on Remembrance Sunday) 5 plays (6 speakers each) and 5 quizzes Play 1- Background Speakers: Winston Churchill, Neville Chamberlain, Hitler, British Child, German Child, Jewish Child Churchill: And who was the master mind behind it? Chamberlain: Why Hitler, of course! Hitler: But only because you sat back and let me. How feeble you were! Why did you think I started building up the German armed forces? I started my war preparations way back in 1933. You had plenty of time to stop me before we all went to war in 1939! British child: OK, so he misread the signs! German child: I'd say it was more a case of weakness! Not like our leader - he didn't need anyone's permission. He just got on with it. Jewish child: He did that all right! He didn't waste any time trying to wipe out a whole race! Play 2 The Course of War 1939-45 Speakers: Neville Chamberlain, Adolf Hitler, Winston Churchill, Stalin, Roosevelt, Emperor Hirohito of Japan Roosevelt: Brave words. But you took a huge risk, you Brits, going it alone. Stalin: Yes, it wasn't long before France was defeated, joining the rest of Europe in Nazi occupation. Churchill: Well, Germany did only have 2 true friends - Italy and Japan, making up the Axis Powers. Play 3 Evacuation Speakers: Evacuee 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 & 6 Evacuee 6: And then being lined up just like animals at an auction! Evacuee 1: Course, the smart rich city kids were the first to be chosen. Evacuee 2: And guess who was the last? Just because I wasn't catwalk material! Play 4 The Blitz - Air Raid Speakers: Air Raid Warden, Mother, Father, Grandad, Child 1 & 2 Air Raid Warden (sighing): I can tell tonight's going to be a very long one! You come with me, Grandad, and I'll take you to the best party in town! Grandad: Now that's more like it! Why didn't you say? Will there be anybody else there? Air Raid Warden: Just a few! Around 200,000 - is that enough for you? Grandad: You mean a rave! Ooh yes! With lots of dancing? Play 5 War-time Life Speakers: Mother, Father, Child, Sailor, Wren, Anne Frank Father: And fat was something you were very unlikely to be! But hey! We were all in the same boat! Sailor: Not with me, you weren't. You thought you had it tough. Huh! You should have tried being at sea. Wren: I did! In the Women's Royal Naval Service. Forget the seagulls! Us wrens were far more highly trained!

Early Colonial Times Class Play or Guided Reading Scripts What could be worse than working all day on your play scripts - and then up all night getting an earful from your characters - telling you what you should have written? Those early colonists certainly weren't reluctant to share their views - especially if that entailed telling their creator his lines were rubbish! The only way to shut these good folk up was to let them have their say - however long it took - even if their idea of setting the record straight was strictly off the record! And so we have 5 sleepless nights -a mild form of torture for our poor playwright but great for us - learning all about: 1. Colonial homes 2. Weaving and spinning 3. Candle and soap making 4. Recreation 5. Religion (including education and punishment) This Reader's Theater Class Play can be read either as a class of 30 or 25, in groups of 6 speakers; or just by a group (of 6), keeping the same characters throughout. Sample Text 1.Colonial Homes Speakers: Playwright Mother Mrs. Smith Father Mr. Smith Son Adam (10 years old) Daughter Abigail (8 years old) Grandma Granny Mrs. Smith: (Sighing) Ah! It doesn't seem like yesterday that you were in those long petticoats! Adam: (Hissing) Mother, please! Granny: Oh let her be, Adam. Us mums always like reminiscing! Mr. Smith: Though you seem to conveniently forget all that howling that came with having babies around! Abigail: (Snorting) Just exercising our lungs! Adam: That's right! Us babies weren't meant to feel any pain! Granny: And so you got ignored! Quite right too! Adam: (Sarcastically) Oh Granny, you're all heart! Granny: Well, you had your ‘puddings'! Playwright: (Yawning) I thought we'd covered meal times! Mrs Smith: (Snorting) So much for thorough historical research! No, she means the padded caps babies wore to protect their heads. And they certainly needed protecting, the amount of falling over they did! Playwright: So why did you dress them up in those ridiculous long gowns? How were they ever meant to crawl about in those things?

Pirates Smugglers and Shipwrecks Guided Reading Scripts plus Quiz This is a special cut-price package including: 3 scripts, with 6 speakers each: • Pirates Ahoy! Script • Smugglers Alert! Script • Shipwrecks! Script Plus • Pirates Quiz Pirates Ahoy! This 'interview' draws out the main historical facts available on these characters. Additional background information is supplied at the end of the play – with a quiz (30 Q & A) to follow. Sample Text 1: Duration around 10 minutes Interviewer: Something tells me we’re not going to get a lot of sense out of Captain Morgan this morning! Mary Read: Oh! Don’t you worry! You wouldn’t believe what us pirates are capable of – even after a large number of rums! Interviewer: Hmm. So I’ve heard! But perhaps we’d better start with this Welshman Black Bart: Who? Me? Interviewer: No. I’ll come to you in a minute. I was going to have a few words with Captain Morgan here – whilst he’s still capable of speech! Blackbeard: (Hissing) You’d better get in there quick, then! And I’d make it a simple question, if I were you! Interviewer: OK. So, why are pirates, pirates? Cpt. Morgan: Because they Arrrrrrrrrrr! Smugglers Alert! Sample Text 2: Duration: around 5 - 10 mins Interviewer: Now, come along, gentlemen! Perhaps we are being a little heavy on Mr. Johnstone! Don’t you agree, Mr. Trenchard? Trenchard: Actually, I’m with them on this one! However much I might have disapproved of the violence I saw going on around me, nothing would have made me turn my old mates in! Interviewer: Well, of course not! Copinger: But that’s what this gentleman did! Rattenbury: Not only did he swap sides as in swapping what country he fought for but he also went from being the hunted to the hunter! Interviewer: You mean, he became a revenue man? Kingsmill: (Spitting) He did indeed! How much lower could he stoop? Shipwrecks - Sample Text 3 Duration: Around 5 minutes (SOSD stands for Salty Old Sea Dogs) S.O.S.D. 1: OK. So what about that Marie Celeste? S.O.S.D. 2: Indeed. What about that Marie Celeste? Nobody knows! S.O.S.D. 3: There may have been survivors – but there was no sign of them when the sailing ship was found drifting in the Atlantic Ocean, 1872. S.O.S.D. 4: Did they abandon ship? Were they attacked? Nobody will ever know what happened. It’s one of those Bermuda Triangle riddles that has no answer.