The air is thick with perfume and giddy conversation, punctuated by the snap of a compact as make-up is subtly checked in a mirror. A skirt is hitched up to reveal more thigh, a jumper tugged down over a too tight waistband. As the door opens, the breathless crowd surges forward.
I’m not describing a concert or even a better than average school disco. This was the scene in the playground on my son’s first day in Year 1, forever etched in school run history as The Year They Had The Hot Male Teacher.
Hot Male Teacher was creative, great at behaviour management, communicative and got good results - excellent teaching skills that were all, sadly, eclipsed by his ability to look good in a tight t-shirt.
Overnight, mums developed a keen interest in their child’s progress at school, suddenly finding excuses for a casual chat about reading levels at the end of the day or offering to help in the classroom.
But this wasn’t just a one-off at my son’s school; the male staff at various schools I’ve worked at have often had a Sex God status among the parents.
What makes some middle-aged mothers (who would be the first to complain if they were ogled by men during their working day) turn into the female equivalent of Benny Hill at the sniff of a male primary teacher?
“It’s the novelty factor,” says my friend Laura. “Male primary teachers are in short supply, so having one at your child’s school is a bit exotic. Plus some mums have been out of the workplace and only socialising with other mothers while they bring up young children. Suddenly seeing an attractive male every day when you’re used to predominantly female company can be a wake up call to the libido.”
Novelty is definitely a factor, as is the skill set of a teacher: if you can nurture and teach children and keep them safe and happy then parents will warm to you. If you also happen to be an attractive male, the combination can prove irresistible for some mums.
But what about female school staff? Are they swooning over male teachers too?
“No!” laughs a teacher friend. “We might find them attractive at first, but that soon fades. Nobody’s sexy once they’ve nicked your hall time and lost the stopwatches that you needed for numeracy.”
She continues: “There’s a bit of workplace banter with my male colleagues, but we’d no more consider perving over them than we would over a family member. We’re all there to do a job.”
It can also be frustrating. When a mum wants to only meet with their child’s (male) teacher instead of the (female) Sendco it becomes a problem because the child’s needs are not being considered. And it can sometimes feel as though your ability as a teacher is overlooked in favour of your male workmate because he’s so popular with his fans.
We used to laugh with my male colleagues about the attention they got from the mums, but I can’t help thinking about how I’d feel as a lone female member of staff with a pack of men out in the playground watching my every move and salivating over how I look. When you imagine a woman in that position it becomes uncomfortable and reveals how inappropriate it really is.
There’s nothing wrong with finding somebody attractive, but openly leering at or sexually harassing anybody is wrong, regardless of their gender, as is any behaviour that prevents them from doing their job effectively.
So while I’m secretly slightly sad that none of the mums break out their best perfume for me when they’re dropping their kids at my classroom door, I’m grateful that to them I’m just somebody who’s doing my job. I’m sure that my male colleagues would prefer to be seen that way too.
Lisa Jarmin is an EYFS teacher and freelance writer based in the North West of England
