Look, not to get all Disney about it. Really, it’s hard to be too sentimental about these things when children are mostly just the wonderful, irritating, fascinating and frustrating colleagues you spend five days a week with.

And there are an awful lot of platitudes out there about what the young can teach us.

We’re supposed to try to see things “through the eyes of a child” to really appreciate them. 

“Out of the mouths of babes” implies that children sometimes cut through to fundamental truths in ways that adults can’t. 

And when we remind ourselves that “children are the future”, we’re tacitly acknowledging that their relevance has greater longevity than ours. 

And the truth is, in my experience as a teacher, I’ve found that children genuinely do have their own wisdom to impart - even if much of it blindsides you at 3.10pm on a rainy Tuesday in November.  

However, since it’s sometimes important to remember the lessons you’ve learned as well as the ones you’ve taught, here are some of the truths I’m not sure I’d really understand if I hadn’t had my own tribe of pint-sized mentors.

1. We all lash out when we’re hurting

Teaching children of all ages requires a fair bit in the way of conflict management and conflict resolution. 

You know the kind of thing: little children are falling out and there are hurt feelings on all sides. Then one person - usually the most isolated or wounded - decides to escalate the situation, in an attempt to redress the power imbalance.  

“You can’t come to my party.” Or: “I want the rubber I gave you back.” Or endless variations on: “You’re not my friend any more.”

It’s easy to think we’re above all this as adults, but I’ve seen my own emotional vulnerability in my private life reflected back at me in a hurt, angry child in the classroom - that lightning flash of pain directed at those around us. 

I might have grown out of “You’re not my friend any more,” but I’m more than capable of my own hurtful words when I’m away from school. 

Seeing children grapple with this - and being required to be the soothing, objective voice in that scenario - means that sometimes I can step back from the brink at home too. Sometimes. I’m still working on it.

2. Vulnerability can be freeing

We’re used to thinking of vulnerability as a negative thing: as something that makes us weak or helpless. 

But I’ve seen children embrace their vulnerability in incredibly liberating ways. Children’s willingness to sing or dance or try something new - regardless of skill or experience level - would put most adults to shame. 

Actually, it takes a lot of bravery to try your hardest at something you might be fundamentally not very good at.

In my personal life, I’m a fairly reserved and cautious person: the type who prefers to wait until they definitely have the right answer before they put their hand up. But the children I’ve interacted with as a teacher have shown me that sometimes it’s OK to just try something, free of the shackles of expectation. 

Choosing to be vulnerable in this way opens up a million paths you’d never otherwise allow yourself to walk down. And, in general, children are brilliant at it. 

3. It’s OK to feel your feelings

This is a secret shared by many of the world’s oldest philosophies…and pretty much anyone under the age of 10. 

This is evidenced by their flagrant disregard for consequences of mess or damage when playing. And being truly present in the moment is one of the surest routes to happiness.

But my pupils over the years have helped me realise it’s not just about fully living in the moment, but fully feeling in the moment too.

Many children laugh, cry, express anger or wonder or surprise in the second that they feel it. They don’t repress those feelings, but nor do they hang on to them once they’re done.

And as someone too quick to cling onto resentments or sensitivities, too keen to analyse and over-analyse events and conversations, I find this idea of sitting with my feelings and just allowing them to be strangely powerful.  

4. You’re as awkward as you feel

There’s a reason why many teachers are able to do things in front of their classes that they find much more difficult in front of other adults. I’ll happily sing during music lessons with my class, but the idea of doing this in front of a group of my peers fills me with terror.

Children are far better than adults at just accepting whatever is going on as normal, and thus sidestepping the awkwardness that adults often bring with them. 

Yes, they can be genuinely abominable to one another, but they can also be surprisingly kind - accepting differences or strong emotions without judgement or agenda.

It’s an attitude I try to carry with me, especially in the face of situations and events that fall outside of the normal standards adults tend to hold themselves to.

5. Love the actor, hate the act

Whether as parents or teachers, we can all be familiar with the feeling of being deeply disappointed in something a child has done, while simultaneously still caring about the child themselves very much.

But how often do we remember that adults sometimes need this compassionate approach, too?

Obviously, adults are far more accountable for their actions than children, but sometimes it’s useful to apply some of our behaviour-management philosophies outside of the classroom, too.

Just try not to use your teacher voice on your significant other too often. Trust me on that one...

Kate Townshend is a teacher in Gloucestershire. She tweets @_KateTownshend