I officially started working for my new school on 20 April following two weeks of digital learning and a jarringly abrupt conclusion to two years in my previous post. Now, with schools finally starting to reopen to pupils across Scotland from today, I feel almost numb after experiencing a whirlwind of conflicting emotions.

On the one hand, I am excited after months of longing for normality. To say I love teaching young people would be a profoundly simplistic understatement; in my darker moments during lockdown I have pored over thank you cards, letters and drawings gifted to me by former pupils in an effort to find comfort in what was an uncertain and frustrating time. Now, I’m chomping at the bit to simply feel like a teacher again.

On the other, I feel four months late to my first day of teaching in my new school. Whereas I have been welcomed with open arms by my new colleagues, it’s perhaps inevitable that I feel a degree of trepidation in my hope to be accepted by pupils and staff alike. Online teaching allowed for a tentative foot in the door, but it’s difficult to foster meaningful relationships with pupils you have only interacted with on Google Classroom.

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However, these natural qualms pale in comparison to the elephant in the room. I am trying to seek comfort in the government’s insistence that now is the right time to reopen schools, but I would be lying if I said I felt completely safe. Even with robust policies, informed protocol and potent hand gel, there is always a risk imposed by Covid-19.

What’s more, this risk goes beyond the possibility of localised outbreaks; I fear for the mental wellbeing of our young people. They are returning to an old routine, bringing with them the weight of months of isolation, fear and potentially long-term trauma. My school has a brilliant reputation for nurture and wellbeing and, with this, I truly hope that I can support the mental health of my pupils.

I hope that, in years to come, I can reflect on this whole saga with pride. I hope that I will settle comfortably into my new school, building positive relationships, looking out for those around me and getting learners to where they need to be. I hope to come out of this a better teacher and a better person.

I’m undoubtedly going to have many more anxious moments. I also know that I have, over the past three years, told teenagers that the most rewarding things in life come more easily with hard work and, inevitably, some fear. With that in mind, I’m prepared to stock up on hand gel and be a little scared in the interim - if it means I can thrive as a teacher once again.

Glen Fraser is a teacher at Clydebank High School, in West Dunbartonshire