STOP THE WORLD! I WANT TO GET OFF.

This is a pretty common feeling towards the end of September. You’ve gone at everything a million miles an hour (you’re engaged, enthusiastic, passionate and full of energy - why wouldn’t you?) and now you’re knackered in a way you never imagined tired could feel. 

Combined with the exhaustion is ongoing stress, which has your cortisol levels going haywire. And there’s a near-constant feeling that you’ve forgotten to do something essential, sometimes resulting in waking up in the middle of the night imagining you’ve accidentally murdered the cat or forgotten your child’s name.

“Are you even watching this programme?” asks your increasingly grumpy partner, as you try to squeeze in some surreptitious test marking during the latest Netflix series. 

“I’m worried about you,” says your mum, and you bark back that you’re “ABSOLUTELY FINE!” as any reasonable human would, harrumphing away and muttering something about how nobody could possibly understand. 

“Are you listening?” says your friend. 

A job that never ends

“Stop!” says a little voice on your shoulder. Stop? But there are books to mark. There’s data to compile, home-school reports to write, emails to answer, schemes of learning to update. You have responsibilities. You have duties. Being a teacher is a job that never ends.

“I had to turn to the whiteboard to let a tear run down my cheek,” said one early-years teacher. “How can a job feel this hard?” asked another. “I’m not sure I’m cut out for this.” 

“Is it normal to feel like a complete failure?” “I just want to curl in a ball and hide.” “I think my line manager hates me.” “I’m letting everybody down.”

For some teachers, this may seem overblown and melodramatic. For me and many of the teachers I speak to, it’s pretty standard for this time of year. You’ve read all the advice. Of course you have. But the reality is something quite different.

And I, with my badge of hypocrisy and my admission of making this mistake time and time again, say to you: stop. Yes, stop. Just for a few moments. At least three times every day, during your working day. Stop.

You make a difference

Stop and let yourself catch up with yourself - a brilliant phrase I heard recently. 

Look up. Step outside if you can. Put your phone away for a moment. Find a point in the distance and look up at it and breathe, just for a minute. It doesn’t matter if you look a bit silly. Did you know that you can’t feel negative emotion if you’re looking up and focusing on a fixed spot? I thought this must be balderdash, but it works.

And then take a few moments more to remember this: you make a difference, every moment of every day. You are special, you are important and the profession is very lucky to have you.

Because - trust me - it is true, even (or especially) when it doesn’t feel like it.

“Bullshit,” says the goblin on your other shoulder. “I can’t even find a pair of matching socks, let alone transform a life. It’s just a matter of time before they realise what a catastrophic mistake they’ve made by hiring me. Mistaken identity. Must be.”

You have tens of thousands of interactions every day. What’s the bet your tired, stressed brain focuses on the two of those that were less than positive? A brusque reminder about a deadline you’d forgotten. A child muttering under its breath about (presumably) how incompetent you are. The parent who complained about the homework you set. 

Human connections

Take a moment to think about some of the other moments. I don’t mean the swanky PowerPoint presentations you’ve prepared or the beautiful triple-coloured reports you’ve compiled. I mean the human connections. The moments like this:

• the child you noticed being a bit quieter than usual. You noticed. That mattered.
• that moment the class collapsed into laughter when you (accidentally on purpose) messed up that sum. They’ll remember how to do it now.
• the parent whose fears you allayed at the school gates this morning, when you pointed through the window and showed her her child throwing himself into the painting activity, all smiles.
• the cereal bar you gave to the child who’d “forgotten” to have breakfast and couldn’t concentrate.
• the colleague whose dress you admired. They’re well chuffed, and will wear it at least once a week until Christmas.
• the senior colleague whose grandchildren you asked after yesterday. That meant a lot.
• the head of department you asked for advice on behaviour management because, you told her, you thought she was brilliant at it. That made her week.
• the two boys in your class who helped a man find his lost dog on the way home from school yesterday because they remembered what you said about random acts of kindness.
• the “spare” chocolate you shared with the office manager.
• the book recommendation you made to your colleague - they’re loving it.

I could go on. And on. And on. When we’re exhausted, it can be so easy to let the negatives dominate. But you matter. 

Give yourself a high five. Give yourself a pat on the back. Plan a half-term break. Promise old friends you’ll catch up then. Do up your seatbelt, keep your jug filled, keep asking questions, let someone know if you’re struggling. Trust me, you’re not alone.

If you feel unable to cope, call the Education Support Partnership hotline on: 08000 562 561.

Dr Emma Kell is a secondary teacher in north-east London and author of How to Survive in Teaching. She tweets at @thosethatcan