Childhood obesity? What childhood obesity? Kenzie weighs about as much as second hand tea bag. His arms and legs are like strings with knots in them and I’ve seen more fat on an oven chip. If there is an epidemic of childhood obesity that will lead to a massive rise in the incidence of type two diabetes in years to come, Kenzie isn’t the best example.
Right now I am sitting in the dining room waiting for him to be prised off the playground to have his lunch. While I’m here, I do my bit to get children to eat properly. This involves encouraging them to use cutlery, to close their mouths while chewing, and to not spit out the stuff that’s got green stuff hidden in it. Despite my best efforts, food accumulates on and around the table until it becomes a health hazard.
Soon I have no choice but to go in search of antibacterial spray and a damp cloth. But in the three minutes I’m away (my journey involves stopping Kyle flicking pieces of carrot at Janine and washing strawberry yoghurt off Alistair’s face and glasses) it seems Kenzie has raced in, had lunch and raced back out again.
This is especially annoying because today I am on Kenzie watch. We have concerns that he’s underweight and my task is to monitor what he eats, how much he eats and how long he takes to eat it. The answer to the last question is three minutes. It seems I will have to go and track him down in order to fill in the rest of his chart.
Finding him is easy, but when I reach the footie area and shout his name, he’s too busy racing around with the ball at his feet to bother listening. I decide against compromising my dignity by trying to catch him. For someone who might be malnourished, he’s remarkably athletic. So much so that it occurs to me he might be the answer to our nation’s childhood obesity concerns.
Kenzie’s hunger to play the beautiful game far outweighs his hunger for food. This means he seldom has time to overeat. Of course, getting all children to want to play football more than they want to eat is unrealistic, but it is possible to get them to reduce their dietary intake by signing them up to my new scheme: The Kenzie School Meals Initiative.
Fast Food for Fitness will be its slogan, not because cheeseburger and chips will be on the menu, but because eating time will be severely restricted. Children will be given exactly three minutes (the time it takes Kenzie needs to eat that portion of his lunch that doesn’t end up in the waste bin) to consume as much as possible. After that, everything left over will be automatically cleared away.
Before I can factor in the increased learning time benefits of this, my thoughts are interrupted by cries of dismay. Kenzie has kicked the ball into the car park and must wait for a passing adult to throw it back. Excellent, this might just give me time to complete his lunch chart.
Steve Eddison is a teacher at Arbourthorne Community Primary School in Sheffield
