There’s an urban legend among teachers in the area I work in and the story varies depending upon who is telling it. It goes a little like this.

Many moons ago, a teacher took a class on a school trip to the zoo. This was in the days before zoos became “wildlife parks”, before the days of risk assessments and adult-to-child ratios. It was also, it seems, in the days before appropriate animal enclosures.

The legend has it that during the course of the day, one child, who was a bit of a live wire, got separated from the group only to be found a bit later soaking wet. On the return journey to school, the child in question was the quietest and best-behaved he had ever been.

There are two endings to this story, the first version finishes with the boy’s good behaviour continuing into the evening at home, with no complaints about an early bedtime. When his mum went to wake him up the following morning, a live penguin was standing there in his room. The second version is my favourite, though, and concludes with the mother driving the child home from school only for the boy to open his backpack to reveal the penguin.

Either way the legend tells of a child “borrowing” a penguin and taking it home. Fictitious though this tale almost certainly is, it does have a moral worth bearing in mind for any key stage 1 teacher embarking on a school trip: your students can be wonderfully unpredictable in class; outside that is magnified by 10.

Our students are not yet of an age where they fully understand the consequences of their actions and can see no problem with doing things that, in later primary years or in secondary schools, students know instinctively is a bad idea. Like stealing a penguin.

So, as a veteran of many a KS1 trip, here are my top five tips to help make sure your outing goes smoothly.

Conduct a ‘reccy’ with the team

Even if you have visited the location before, make sure you take all staff who are going on the trip on a preliminary visit. That way you can agree on the risk assessment and know exactly what you are all talking about. Things might have changed from your last visit, too. Note the location of toilets, where the coach will park (which may be different from where cars park) and identify covered seating in case of a rainy lunchtime. Trips involving water, such as a seaside visit, require permission from the local education authority, which can take up to six weeks to come through. As a general rule, I say no to “shopping time”.

Remember to take a bucket

If you’re stuck in a traffic jam on a coach with 30+ children, a bucket can be useful as an emergency toilet, and can be used for travel sickness or to store soiled clothes. (It can also be useful for pregnant members of staff with morning sickness, as I discovered last year.)

Eat lunch on the coach before the trip

It is hard making time for lunch at school but on a trip, it is impossible. You are trying to marshall multiple little people and their lunch boxes, and deal with so many issues around said lunch boxes, that the allocated lunch period is over before you have had time to unwrap your own soggy sandwiches. So my advice is to eat your lunch on the journey to your location - I have been told by several coach drivers that this is quite usual.

Prepare the children and the helpers Discuss the rules of the trip with the children the day before, making sure that carers are aware of what the children need to bring, reminding them to pack lunches in backpacks - unless, of course, you fancy carrying everyone’s lunch? The weather can change quickly so a “pac-a-mac” is essential, even in summer. Hold a meeting for helpers before the day, too. Make sure they are aware that talking on mobiles or texting on the trip is inappropriate. I have also had extended members of a family, such as grandparents, turn up to meet helpers, expecting to join the trip for lunch. This is quite awkward and, in these sorts of situations, it’s important to be brisk and ask them to sit on another picnic bench away from the group. While they might be annoyed, they will soon understand once you throw the word “safeguarding” around a bit.

Defend your class!

Personally, I find that peacocks cause the most trouble on a school trip and can be found at many castles. Geese and swans are also aggressive and may need to be considered in the risk assessment in terms of where to stop for lunch. On trips to the seaside, adults often have to stand guard against dive-bombing seagulls, much to the amusement of the crowd. Other schools can also get quite territorial at lunchtimes, especially if it is raining and the covered picnic area space is limited.

Alice Edgington is acting headteacher at St Stephen’s Infant School in Canterbury