The bell rang for the end of the lesson, and a student shyly sidled up to me.

Thinking she was going to ask for an extension on her homework, I went to get my planner. But instead, she informed me that apparently, Year 7s had been saying myself and Miss B were “friendship goals”.

I laughed and shooed her out.

Miss B is, in fact, my best friend, not just at school, but in life too. There are times I walk into school having had very little sleep, and she will pop into my classroom with a cuppa, or make sure I have had a break and eaten lunch.

I think I really appreciated how important that friendship was when a promotion meant I was teaching predominantly at our other campus. It was really hard to accept that I wouldn’t see her as often. I felt quite isolated to begin with, and this is when I realised how valuable it is to have friendships in your place of work.

A school can be a lonely place

According to the British Red Cross, a third of education workers feel lonely at school. Not only this, but we also have a huge issue in the education sector with teacher retention.

We spend hours upon hours with our colleagues, and so it is absolutely imperative to be friends with the people you work with. But how can leaders help foster these relationships?

These are my four top tips:

1. Staff social events

Staff social events can be a challenge to organise - whether you’re just doing something with your department, or across the whole school.

But when you take staff outside of the school building, coupled with a nice drink and meal, bowling or a theatre trip, there isn’t that need to discuss work matters anymore, and everyone has a good time.

As a leader, I’d highly recommend you organise as many socials as you can. If they don’t get a high turnout to begin with, don’t be put off. These types of events take time to grow; you’ll soon hear the conversations on a Monday about last Friday night.

2. Preserve the sanctity of the staffroom

Not only is the staffroom a big factor in cultivating good working relationships, but it’s also a place where staff from different curriculum areas can come together to wind down.

I found when I make an effort to go down to the staffroom at break time and say hello to as many people as possible it makes a real difference to how I feel about my day.

This was particularly true when I was working at my new campus, and it made a huge impact on how quickly I was able to settle in. Also, it was important to me for staff to know that when they come over to the sixth form building to teach they could always have a natter with me.

Along with this, it is really important to make these areas a place where staff feel relaxed. Furnish the rooms with books, plants and cushions. Make it an environment that boosts positive energy.

3. Make CPD sessions fun

CPD sessions can also be a great way to grow friendships. Teachers and support staff all joined the profession because we have a shared common interest. So really, what better place than CPD sessions is there to make friends?

This is even better when you mix up departments and job roles. Mixing up the people you are sat with provides a good starting point for creating a friendship outside of your own bubble.

4. Model the behaviour you hope to see

Finally, the golden rule of teaching is always modelling, right? Well, this is no different. As a leader, your job isn’t just to lead on school matters. You have the job of making sure your staff are happy.

So make sure you go down to the staffroom at break and lunch, and talk about things non-work related. Say hello to people in the corridor, ask them how they are, take an interest in their lives outside of work. Your staff will see you as approachable and gradually trust you and consider you a friend.  

We all have a duty to be nice to the people around us, especially as teachers. We know how hard a day at school can be - sometimes you can go a whole day without speaking to an adult! This is why I urge you, go out there and give time to cultivating beautiful friendships.