One of the more unexpected side effects of living through a pandemic is the fact that it has helped to make being kind fashionable. 

There’s the rise of the #BeKind movement on social media, while big business and public services are imploring us to think of others as we go about our days with motivational quotes displayed at train stations and on A-boards outside coffee shops.

Kindness is becoming big news in academia, too. Professor Robin Banerjee, director of the Sussex Kindness Institute and a developmental psychologist at the University of Sussex, points out that “in the 1980s, if you searched research databases for articles with ‘kindness’ in their title or abstract, there were just 35 articles. Now there are more than 1,000”.

Banerjee credits the ramped-up interest in doing good partly to “the last five years of political polarisation and, of course, Covid”.

He is at the helm of The Kindness Test, a public survey run in collaboration with the BBC, which has been completed by thousands of people around the world. It aims to unpick what kindness really means, with the results set to be published early next year. Reaching a consensus is unlikely to be easy, though. Kindness, after all, can mean different things to different people. 

In education, for example, the concept of kindness is featured in wall displays, talked about in circle time, and is invariably ingrained in school values. But how far do those messages actually play out in classrooms and corridors?

This is a question that primary teacher Adrian Bethune has asked himself many times. Bethune is wellbeing lead at Broughton Junior School in Aylesbury, Buckinghamshire, where he aims to place kindness front and centre - and he says that there are some very good reasons for other schools to do the same.

“Research shows that kindness is contagious and doing good feels good,” Bethune explains. “When we are kind to others, the reward
centre of our brain lights up and we get a hit of dopamine - the so-called ‘happy hormone’. Our bodies release another hormone called oxytocin, which helps us feel connected to others, lowers our blood pressure, lowers our stress levels and protects our hearts. So kindness is good for us, physically.”

Indeed, studies have shown that helping others through volunteering can reduce the risk of early death by as much as 24 per cent. Volunteering has also been associated with lower risk factors for cardiovascular disease, and with reduced rates of depression. 

Meanwhile, a 2016 study conducted in the US found a link between spending money on others and a reduction in blood pressure. In the UK, a 2010 study linked “acts of kindness” to increased life satisfaction. That means that simply buying a coffee or making a cup of tea for a colleague could benefit you as much as them.

Nice work

There’s plenty of evidence to support the idea that kindness improves both our physical and mental health - and there is also evidence that it can make us more productive. In a big US study of more than 50,000 individuals, published in the Journal of Applied Psychology, higher rates of courtesy, helping and praise were linked with higher productivity and efficiency.

It pays to be nice, at an organisational level and a personal one, and that applies to education as much as to any other sector. But isn’t kindness already being encouraged in schools? 

According to a recent survey by bullying prevention charity Kidscape and wellbeing specialists BounceTogether, the picture in schools is largely positive, with 94 per cent of primary and secondary pupils saying they are kind to others and 88 per cent agreeing that their teachers are kind. 

Schools such as Bethune’s are also taking practical steps to further promote kindness. He says that staff and pupil wellbeing surveys are conducted biannually in the autumn and summer terms to gauge happiness and satisfaction and recently, during Anti-Bullying Week, there was a whole-school homework challenge in which every child was encouraged to carry out a random act of kindness at home or in the community.

However, Banerjee suggests that it’s not enough for individuals to be kind; compassion and empathy need to be woven through the entire school. 

“When you talk about a child behaving in a kind way or not a kind way, it’s not just about the child. What’s the overall context? What is the school like? You [have] to think about kindness in the school community,” he says. 

Asking pupils to be kind will be meaningless if teachers and leaders aren’t also modelling the same behaviour towards each other. It all comes back to that idea of “organisational” kindness. As Banerjee points out, “what’s happening with the children is connected with what’s happening in the school as a workplace”. 

“It isn’t just about exhorting kids to be nice to each other,” he says. “Are we in an environment that feels kind to everybody? What does it feel like for the staff members?”

Bethune, likewise, says that he sees kindness as a thread that runs from the very top of the school down to the young people being educated. 

“Children learn far more from caregivers’ unconscious behaviours than any conscious manipulations. They watch our body language, our interactions with the people we pass in the corridors. We can talk about the importance of being kind, but, ultimately, the best thing we can do is to model it,” he says.

Stress test

However, Bethune admits that reflecting on how “kind” your school culture is might not always be top priority for staff, given the combined pressures of workload and accountability that they are operating under. “It’s definitely harder to be empathetic when you’re stressed. You go into survival mode,” he says. 

For many teachers, levels of stress have been higher than usual since the start of the pandemic. A survey published earlier this year by the NASUWT teaching union showed that 81 per cent of teachers had experienced an increase in workplace stress in the preceding 12 months and 87 per cent had experienced anxiety. Almost half said their job was affecting their mental health. 

“I think it’s important to acknowledge that when we’re under pressure we might become less kind; feel like we don’t want to have that chat in the staffroom at breaktime because we have too much to do,” says Bethune. 

Banerjee suggests that leaders have an important role to play in countering this by setting the right example and incorporating kindness into their leadership style.

“Dominance, power, influence, leadership are sometimes positioned as antithetical to kindness,” he says. “There can be an idea that if you’re in a position of leadership and you want to get things done, you don’t have time for kindness. It’s an illusion that kindness is a sign of weakness and that you’re letting people walk all over you.”

Shabnam Ahmed, head of Year 12 at Thurston Sixth Form in Suffolk, agrees. “I try to lead from a place of kindness,” she explains. “When I’m interacting with the staff I manage, I remind myself of how it was for me earlier in my career. It’s about putting myself in their shoes.”

Leaders need to take the time to reflect on their own behaviour, then. But, as previously mentioned, perhaps one of the biggest barriers to kindness is that feeling of being far too overwhelmed and busy, which leaders are just as prone to as teachers.

Banerjee suggests that leaders should, therefore, not forget the importance of being kind to themselves. “One of the risks is that we put all the emphasis on looking out, supporting others, and that can be exhausting,” he says. 

To help herself, Ahmed keeps an “appreciation” folder in her inbox in which she files any praise that she receives. “If I’m having a bad day, I flick through it and those words of kindness really make a difference,” she says. 

Meanwhile, Bethune believes that all teachers - leaders included - would do well to step back and assess their work-life routine. “When I do teacher wellbeing training, I often ask teachers to think about how they look after themselves and the number of hours they’re working. I ask them, ‘Would you be happy for the children you are teaching to grow up and lead the life that you’re leading? If not, why are you doing it? ’”

While teachers admittedly “work in systems and cultures that demand a lot” from them, Bethune believes that it is possible to change those settings for the better, and that examples of good practice are out there.

“I’ve worked in different schools with different work ethics and cultures. We know that kinder employees have less time off sick, they’re more productive, more creative. Ultimately, your school will be better off for having a kinder, less stressed culture,” he says. 

So there you are. Now, go and make that cuppa for your colleague. 

Christina Quaine is a freelance journalist. Robin Banerjee is one of the speakers at the 2022 World Education Summit. Tes is the official media partner for the event. For more information or to book tickets, visit worldedsummit.com

This article originally appeared in the 10 December 2021 issue under the headline “Tes focus on… Kindness”