Earlier this year, I found myself talking outside to a young man in Year 11. He was wearing sliders and socks after a tough football match at the weekend had left his feet blistered and sore.
We talked about football, recovery and discomfort without any signs of alarm. He was relaxed, making eye contact and engaging in a reciprocal conversation in a very mature manner.
The next thing I knew, I was on the ground as a sock-covered right foot kicked me in the face, after being knocked down by an unbelievably rapid and aggressive series of punches to my head.
Waiting at the hospital to be checked for concussion, I had plenty of time to try and figure out how this could have happened. What did I miss?
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I’m a social, emotional and mental health difficulties (SEMH) specialist, a senior mental health lead and a qualified Sendco - and above all, I’m a relationships-driven practitioner with a demonstrably strong relationship with the student in question.
The simple truth is that I didn’t miss anything in the moment. My team and I did miss a lot however in the lead up. This has given me reason to reflect on how we prepare learners to manage their behaviour, accept support for co-regulation and develop their skills to regulate as they transition to adulthood.
A video review of this incident showed me everything I didn’t see in the moment, and it was everything we knew to look for. His weight was shifting, he’d handed over the contents of his pockets to a friend in the moments before, he’d called his mum and argued half an hour earlier while off site at the gate; he’d even stopped to adjust his waistband and the seams of his socks before engaging me in conversation.
Unfortunately, while this camera footage didn’t help keep me safe, a focus on mapping stress accumulation and adapting provision has helped me to support students, their siblings and their struggling families by ensuring a quietly compliant powder keg isn’t dropped back into the home.
Equally, it has allowed me to support young people who have already spent their emotional budgets before the morning bell even rings. Our team is able to start slowly, gently or creatively rather than sending an all-too-likely behaviour concern into an experience we know they will not navigate well.
Putting plans in place
We have created per-student plans, titled ‘reducing stress accumulation across the day’. These start with 14 points that account for the common, but easily missed, triggers of stress and anxiety.
They are laid out to show the student that they are being heard and that their fears are understood, and we go point by point to identify a “what” with a “how” and a “we will”.
Creating the plans can be a labour of love and will usually involve a planning session with a parent, the pupil, their teacher and our Sendco. This collaborative approach has led to more reliable successes, with stakeholders feeling better understood and more reliably listened to.
Interestingly, we’ve seen success with intervention ideas that are not new, but just formalised, giving the student agency in their experience. To support this, the plans are shared widely, from teachers to admin and lunch staff in a bid to support all stakeholders: the child, the parent and the staff.
In a recent plan for a male student, we focused one point on the misunderstanding of eye contact in social communication among a large and diverse staff body. Following a pattern of escalations to crisis in the dining hall, and immediately after on the playground, one of his 14 points was as follows:
What: Understanding and acceptance of limited, sporadic or overly sustained eye contact.
How: Class teacher will ensure all adults working with the student regularly or as a one off will be aware of their eye contact modulation. Adults understand both the limitations of eye contact for this student but are also prepared to recognise a change in eye contact as symptomatic of an increase in stress or distress, a change from avoiding to staring.
We will: Be mindful that when discussing eye contact with peers, or leading conversation of perceived social norms and polite behaviour that these expectations are not universal and that it is normal for some students to not meet them. We will continue positive interaction and model social communication with this student and encourage social cues from them that show actively listening without eye contact - for example, nodding or shoulders towards the speaker even if their head is facing away.
Following this intervention for six weeks, we saw three trends:
- Firstly, his lunchtime behaviour reports reduced to zero across the period
- Secondly, no fixed-term suspensions were recorded
- Finally, book looks showed significant improvement in engagement and output in afternoon lessons
While these outcomes were not achieved as a result of this one point alone, they do demonstrate success in catering for a neurodivergent learner in an environment of considerable sensory stress - and that this can be done through exposure and modulated adult support, rather than removal or isolation from an opportunity to develop new skills.
None of the plans’ points alone will lead to wholesale change, but they do combine to create a feeling of ownership and understanding between the child and the school.
By zooming in on the all-too-small antecedent section of the assault cycle we can save a child from careening into an emotional crisis - a huge win for our moral purpose to improve the child’s experience, and a gift to all parents and teachers, too.
Benn Lee is assistant headteacher and designated safeguarding lead at King’s Academy Lord Wilson in Southampton
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