Five years ago I injured my head and face badly. It was a Monday morning in September and I was getting off my bike with the mixture of energy and anticipation that makes me love being a headteacher.
As I wheeled my bike to lock it up, I stumbled over a piece of wood and fell headlong on to the corner of a metal skip, flinching to turn my head fast enough to avoid losing an eye but sustaining a deep cut running from below my right eyebrow to the top of my head.
There was a lot of blood. I remembered my paediatric first aid training and held my bike gloves and jacket firmly over the bleeding whilst my deputy phoned for an ambulance.
Lessons for EYFS
Over the month that followed, I learned a lot about myself. I also learned something important about working with young children in the early years. It forced me to think about what helps people in a strange and stressful situation, and what doesn’t.
When I arrived in hospital, I was taken straight into a hi-tech emergency area. I had no idea what was going on as the busy medics checked out various things which, in retrospect, must have been time-critical.
No one really spoke to me, until a nurse came over, who noticed I was shivering. She put a special sort of blanket around me.
“This will make you feel a lot better,” she said.
As she held my hand and inflated the blanket with warm air, I cried with relief. It’s hard to explain how important a moment like that is.
Much later, this experience helped me to think about what it must be like for a small child who is being settled into an early years setting.
Everyone understands that, sooner or later, the parent is going to leave. Everyone, that is, except for the person at the heart of the situation: the small child.
Balance kindness with confidence
Most children take it in their stride. But, for some, the situation is strange, disempowering and stressful. They’re the only people who don’t know what’s really going on - just like I was, lying on that hospital trolley. That’s when human warmth, kindness and sympathy can go a long way.
But it also made me wonder if you can have too much of a good thing. What helped me most, in those early hours in hospital, was the efficient and confident way that the medical team worked. I wasn’t continuously asked if I was OK. If I had been, it would have unsettled me. It was best to keep still and trust the doctors.
Have you ever noticed a small child holding their feelings in check, until someone kindly asks them “Are you OK?” and that’s when they fall apart?
Kindness and sympathy go a long way, but they need to be balanced with a sense of professional confidence and encouragement. Small children need us to give them a sense of “I know you can do this” as well as a feeling that “I am in safe hands”.
Dr Julian Grenier is the headteacher of Sheringham Nursery School and Children’s Centre. He co-leads the East London Research School, and he tweets @juliangrenier
